A number of quite surprising things have happened to me this week including, but not limited to, making a few new friends, old friends coming out of the woodworks (even though on of them thinks that I’m a mad axe murderer), a couple of appointments that I’ve been looking forward to for a while, and a surprising ability to study competently.

I’m also really happy with my new phone. I feel like a weight has been lifted off of my shoulders; the menus are so intuitive, the ringtones are crisp and clear, I can change settings online, I can actually read my email on it without squinting and follow links right from the message. I can get my RSS feeds, although I admit that a phone isn’t the ideal medium for reading articles. Then there are all of the Java games and apps that I can download onto it. It’s been a while since I could say that a device has made me happy. Sony Ericsson K300i, you complete me.

Last thing. This is from the Ice Chewers Bulletin Board:

I got 2 more of the metal sliver ice trays from ebay this week making my total 14 now. I go thru that many a day easy and it takes quite a while to fill them up layer by layer but it really is the best. All white and soft and tastes great. I also have a chest style deep freezer that I use and squirt water all over the edges of it and then when I empty my ice trays I scrape that very thin ice off the sides and it is the very best. I have gotten alot of people around me addicted as well even non ice chewers. I’ve had to tell a few of my friend to get their own ice trays and leave my ice alone so if you don’t want to have to share keep it to yourself from the start. lol……..

Will someone please tell me that I sound like a lunatic if I ever get that way about anything.

This one is about 4 minutes long ladies and gents so grab some popcorn or a rice cake if that tickles your fancy (you know who you are), sit back, relax and remember to table the label. I guarantee you will love this shit.

I woke up this morning to the sound of Amy Goodman’s voice telling me about a Bush administration arms embargo against Venezuela and how Chavez said that he was going to sell 10 F-16 fighter jets to Iran in retaliation. Seems like the international dick measuring contest is continuing as planned. Upon further inspection, I found that the New York Times had reported the story a bit differently on their website. Their report says that General Alberto Muller simply recommended the sale to Mr Chavez and that no decision had yet been made. So my question today is this. Do I believe those who say that they are “the exception to the rulers” or believe “all the news that’s fit to print“?

Dear Beanie Weenie,

I would like to thank you for helping me to realize that my choice of phones is directly related to my relationship status. At first glance, this seemed like a completely ridiculous idea, but upon further inspection your theory rings true.

Take for example my Nokia 3650. I had this phone when I was going out with Shannon and in many ways, the phone paralleled what was going on in the relationship; the round dial pad represented her back and forths about my complete disregard for religion, the intermittent internet service analogous to the mixed signals which she sent and finally, the sheer size of the phone is easily likened to her voluptuous form. I got rid of this one shortly after Shannon and I parted ways.

Then I got the T630. Now that was a sexy phone, I definitely had this one for the longest and I think that I ran through two and a half different relationships with that one. We had Nicole, Tiffany and that quick thing with Maggie M., ah yes, what a phone…but my T630 and I had some bad days too. Although to be fair I have to say that the phone was starting to fall apart and I had to change to that black faceplate and cover. And the camera got cracked and I think that my eyes must have been affected too because what happened next clearly reflects a lack of judgment and a total disregard for the obvious.

It was toward the end of our days together (the T630 and I) that I started messing with J. Furlow. Mistake number one. And it was during the same period that I got caught up with Lady Hatton. Mistake number two. I learned my lesson and quickly switched to my Motorola A630. I kept Kim however, and she was the first one to survive intact during a “switch”.

The A630 fucking sucked and it soon started to charge irregularly, and I can say with a high degree of certainty that my level of attraction to the Hat was often equal to that of my phone’s battery level. Which is to say…low. I believe however that the Hat saw through my obsession with phones and it was with some degree of derision that she suggested that I get a cheap phone.

I must stop here to note that until this point, price had always been a secondary (or maybe even tertiary) concern when it came to getting a new phone. My primary concern has always been a balance between form and function. But her suggestion insistence that I get a phone for under $100 simply did not fit into my current cell phone switcheroo paradigm. I decided to go her way though and get a Sharp GX15.

The GX15 had all of the features that I was looking for, Bluetooth, IR, triband, camera, WAP browser but it was ugly as sin. I mean, it was fucking ugly. It was very sturdy and I don’t think that if I dropped it out a window that it would even get a scratch on it but it was ugly. Go back to the webpage and look at it again…pretty ugly right. And it was with that phone that Hatton met her end (after an admittedly amazing run…three phones!!! that’s simply unprecedented). I must point out though that she was around during a particularly high phone turnover period…nevertheless, I salute you Hatton.

I finally got rid of that phone a few days ago (I think that it was draining my soul (much like the previously mentioned girlfriend)). The irony though, is that I got one that is even cheaper, although I think that it’s a little cutie. I made an attempt to go back to my original selection method although I did make concessions for price (a limit of $300) but it turned out that this phone cost me $63 before shipping (bless your binary soul FeeBay). Anyway, I’m now the proud owner of a Sony Ericsson K300i. We’ll see how this one works out.

Sincerely,

Richard Lewis

P.S.
I just remembered that I had a Sony Ericsson T610 for about a week before I got that A630 and I also had a Motorola V220 that I was using for about 4 days before the T610. That means that Hatton was around for FIVE phones…Wow!! That also means that I switched phones four times in a six month time period…That’s a bit excessive.

I went to a party last night and met this girl who I thought looked like someone that I had met before. I seem to be getting that feeling a lot lately (mental disorder anyone???) but I asked her if we had met before and she said no and that was basically it. Later on in the night as I was heading home, I started to think about how I recognize people. Specifically, what features I recall about them that makes me remember them when I see them again. For her, it wasn’t her face, but her hair (which I later remembered was just the same as a bartender at the Porch that used to make me these incredible mojitos).

Anyway, I find myself remembering things about people that are easily changed; their hair, a bag that they carry, shoes, earrings, voice, but rarely their faces. Granted, if I’ve known you for a while, I’ll remember you no matter what but everyone else…good luck.